When the Nib Gets Dry, the Ink Doesn’t Flow

 

Today:

I felt so tired I could feel my body hitting the floor, only it wasn’t.  Whew.  Getting used to heart meds again…may as well just have a bed on wheels attached to my body to drag it along with me so that I can rest at any opportunity. 

I got a good nap today…feel better for the moment.  Sometimes my heart meds don’t affect me, but mixed with a cold and meds…zonked.

———-

Worship:

Extraordinary today at church today.  Sound was perfect.  Things seems in sync.  So refreshing. 

Prayer time saw many ministered to. 

Healing was even testified toward at the end of the service.  Precious.

Daisy Dog:  barking non-stop.  The boys played with her some today and she is not ready to call it quits.

Currently:  four boys in my TV room playing Playstation together with a new “multitap” we got for Christmas.  The competitive game of football, with no one getting hurt!

In Sunday School today: I taught the kids about fountain pens.  Yup.  Work out of your passions, I say.  I taught them how the ink can get clogged in the nibs of the pen after months of not using them.  I showed them several pens and the different width of nibs — how it made the lettering change, then we got to the one that wouldn’t write.  I asked if they knew why and took my drinking water, dropped it in there.  Soon, ink began to flow, though watered down at first. 

We are like that dried-out pen sometimes.  Just with daily use, we can get so stopped up so that it seems nothing is coming out of us.  And the less we are used, the worse it gets.  We feel dry.  Funny thing is, we blame God, though he’s still there, full!  We saw it in the cartridge of this pen.  Brand new cartidge of ink, just sitting there.  But…no flow!  The problem was not with the ink, but with the ink dried inside the nib.  It was clogged up.  

We soaked the nib in my water cup for a while, and sure enough, it began to flow.  Diluted at first.  But soon, flowing black, shiney, and fast again.  Beautiful wet ink.

They all wanted their names written.  I wrote their names for them, AND their “one little word” to help guide them in some personal challenges for 2008. 

I love my class.  I love teaching it more every week.  I have such a receptive class this year.

Except for one boy.  He said, “Is that it?  That’s the cool thing?” Okay, so he’s honest.  “A hard sell!” the Hub said.  But, he wanted his name written on “a whole page to himself”!!!  He thought it was cool.  Maybe he’ll remember the lesson anyway someday!

You know, I can think of some places my nib “needs cleansing”.  I’m longing for a day with Christ alone very soon for that very purpose.  I love times like right after my Great Banquet experience where any “ick” was removed from days of deliberate soaking.  Things just flowed so easily.  I need that again, Lord.  Bring it on.  I’m ready.

My “ONEs” for the Year

One word for the year…that’s what I’ve been thinking toward the last few years.  One phrase.  One scripture.  One thing. 

I can do that.

Today Sunday School, I forgot my short story book…where prayers are made: ”Lord, help!”

The early AM services helped move us into the direction of resolutions–where I wanted to go.  I’d made stars for the kids to write their “one word”, but I needed a story to tie it together before class.

We talked about a short word or phrase goal for the year.  Some of mine have been:  “Smile.”  “Joy.”  “Shine”.  “Seek peace”. 

When class started, I said, “Does anyone know what ‘resolution’ means?”

By the time we finished, I was teaching them about pictures and clarity and computer screen resolution and pixels…and we decided that “resolutions” lead to “higher resolution”…a clearer picture in our lives of Christ.  Now, how cool is that?

We put our one word on a star and decorated it with sequins, putting thoughts around the one wor that gave us some direction as to how to attain the one word goal.  Finally, I helped them find scriptures that spoke to that goal.  Everytime I shared a key word I’d focused on, one of them would pipe in spontaneously with a song to go with that keyword.  Eli was the first, then Keely, then others.  I told them they were like the funny  little mice on the movie “Babe”. 

After they shared their words:  “health, active, attitude…(great thoughts)”, I shared mine:

Ta-Da!  It always feels like magic of some sort when I get my “new word” for the next year.  It usually comes from repeat exposure, a sense of awe and inspiration that comes–something that I can’t get out of my head.  Usually something that surprised me or caught me as “new” or relevant or needful.  Not necessarily divinely inspired in any spiritual moment…just something I can focus on as a whole and be walking in the right direction in seasons where things may feel “fuzzy”.

This year’s came from a scripture Bro. Ray brought out about a month ago, 2 Timothy 2:22.  All three of these have similar and basic elements that describe an effective walk with Christ:  turning, seeking, and pursuing. 

1. Psalm 34:14 (Support verse, OT)
   Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.
    
2. 2 Timothy 2:22 (My One VERSE)
   Flee the evil desires of youth {[note to self:  think about what those are]}, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.
    
3. 1 Peter 3:11 (Support verse, NT re-quoted))
   He must turn from evil and do good; he must seek peace and pursue it.

I’d like to add this year to teach them to my kids.  Key verses.  I can do that.

Life Worship

Today, our children’s Sunday School lesson was about “church”.

The boys were ‘bulls’ today, and have forgotten any semblence of non-crazy behavior, so we also talked about ‘reverence’ and ‘quiet’, and we practiced it.

I figured they thought I was probably a very weird teacher or something.

We got in the van and my daughter said, “That was a very restful class today mom.  It was like, really relaxing!”

She meant it.  It’s so easy to tink all kids need the hype…but some kids also need quiet…important to learn to offer both, I guess.

I am working on “worship” at home today.  As in “order”…cleaning without grunting and complaining.  Servanthood.  Joyful community service.  It’s refreshing.  Still no TV…but they are still asking every time every task is done…and there are MANY more tasks to go.  How many do I force today?  In any case, it’s better than it was when we walked in.

Blessings!

Maggie 

9-3 Sunday Review

I am SO tired today.  Like, dropping-lower-in-my-seat, deep-cranky-tired!  I’m not sure why, except that I’ve been able to pin this predictable day down by hormonal cycle for months.  IckkKK. 

The best “word picture” I can come up with: my family (and life in general) are woodpeckers…I am the tree.  It’s nothing personal.  It just is.  GET AWAY!  Okay, so perhaps summer has gotten as long as it needs to and it is indeed now time for school to start so that I can get good and refreshed as a mom.  How you homeschool moms do it…I’m not yet sure.  Wow.  Go girls. 

I tried to nap and doing things to cheer up–I just think it would be better for humanity for me to stay in bed and not get up! 

~~* 

School is starting for my kids in two days.  [insert raw Mom scream that says:  oh-no-more-time-has-passed-and-my-kids-really-ARE-growing-up-and-do-we-have-enough-crayons-and-clothes-that-fit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????]

I saw this trend with other on-line moms a few weeks ago.  They were all freaking out and cleaning out their houses and cutting out blogging and trying to get back in focus.  Yup. 

So, here I am, too tired to do much productive about this deadline. 

Am I ready?  Nope.  I was three weeks ago.  Uniforms were all laundered and the clothes hangers all ready with navy and tan and polos.  Um…the kids got excited and started wearing them all, so now I have no idea where any of it is or what fits.  Ugh.

“I JUST DON’T WANT TO!!!!”

Everything feels overdone in my psyche today: too much media, too much sound, too much sibling picking, too much entertainment, too much junk food, too much time wasted, too much cheer, too much tragedy…too much everything!  Everyone leaves everything out and open and messy…and here am I, but don’t send me to clean it up!  Bill over at Spiritual Oasis sent me a fitting scripture yesterday for just such a moment:

 ”You call out to God for help and he helps—he’s a good Father that way. But don’t forget, he’s also a responsible Father, and won’t let you get by with sloppy living.” (I Peter 1:17 The Message).

Okay, so it was a zinger for my heart, too, but that does not negate it’s likely placement on my fridge! 

Without emotional energy to address the basics, there is this odd conflicting desire to get control over something big in my life, like overhauling the whole house and decluttering it.  Not at all a bad thing.  The whole feng yei or whatever it is where energy is supposed to flow better through a house with nothing stored under the beds and such?  This nonsense seems appealing to me.  (Wha??!?!!!)  ACtually, my sweaters just NEED to live under the bed.  So much for “positive energy” flowing. 

~~~*

My hubby wants to take me on the late birthday date tomorrow…hopefully fresh hormones will be in place by that time and I won’t be annoyed by his Disney excitement.  My whole family has lost it.  They have ”Disney-itis”.  It’s like the pre-Christmas rush. 

Me?  I am resistent to and slow to be sold on anything overpromoted.  I seriously PRAY I’ll be able to join in, relax, and just enjoy watching their excitement build.  Is there any other mother in America who would not be completely and totally blessed to see her kids awe over Disney.  The cost?  Wow.  The fact that the church is doing little to compete to capture the imaginations of kids?  As a child, I never had such a surreal experience.  I hope they understand the blessing of what they are getting!  I told my husband that before we went, we need to teach them what a “once in a lifetime experience” means!  Spiritual preparation for Disney?    I hope we have a great time.  I just have a hard time getting into seven days of it all packed in so tight.  I am a girl who needs and values some down time…for EVERYBODY.  Is there any way to raise kids into today’s world without them being “hyped” about something that SEEMS larger than life constantly?  New technology, new this, more that…so contrary to the push for simplicity I constantly hear the Lord asking me to pursue (as much as I fail as it myself). 

~~~~* 

In my 2 yr. old SS class today (my second week teaching), a visitor came (actually three)!

The first sentence out of the kid’s mouth was, “My mom igot put in jail last night.  But it’s not her fault!!!  She didn’t do anything wrong.  It was my Dad.  I don’t know why they put HER in jail.  She didn’t do anything wrong!” 

One way to break the ice.  Notice they don’t put ice breaker questions in the children’s material?  No wonder!

This situation was NOT in my lesson planning!  [Um...flip madly through book coming up with a plan...nothing there.]  Only scripture coming to mind: “What then shall we say to this…“

My daughter somewhere in the hour remembers her “big news” about Disney which she CANNOT WAIT to tell her friends! (The other two visiting come from gov. housing, bused in by the church.  She asks with a hand raised and an “Oh. Oh! Oh!!! Can I tell our surpise now?!”  [Disney trip]. 

“No, now is not a good time.”

“Why not?”

“It’s not appropriate.” 

“Why not?”

“It’s just not a good time.”

“But WHY?” tearing up.

“Um.  Meet me out in the hall for a second.” leaving the kids.

“Darlin’.  Do you really think a child who’s mother was put in prison last night and kids who are not living both parents at all are going to enjoy hearing about our nice family trip to Disney.  They will probably NEVER get a chance to go at all.”

“Oh.  Okay.”  

Yeah.  That defines, “once in a lifetime experience” pretty well.  To both of us.

~~~~~* 

So, follow up with this child?  Give up my birthday trip to go see a mom in prison I don’t know?  What?  Anything?  Wow.  We have SO much to learn to reach the people we pray to reach.  The pastor had just given us a quote today during church that I tried to jot down but they took it down by the time I found a pen and paper.  I think it was by some guy named “More”.  He said:

The things that we pray for,

Give us the grace to labor for.

Do you pray to reach the downcast and imprisoned?  What will it cost us to reach them?  Are we really passionate about it to the point of sacrifice?

Our pastor gave us another quote today, notable also.  It went something like:

There are two reasons to serve, for recognition, or just for the joy of serving to do the work.  God told me to do it for the latter, there is much less competition there.  (Mother Teresa).  

Perhaps after a day and some sleep, I’ll have all the energy and all the answers!  Our pastor said that we should have “synergy”…from the root words which add “same as” and “energy-work”.  I may not be able to figure it out.  I may be hormonal and cranky and tired…but if I can find “synergy” and “go with God” letting his energy and work flow through me…I just might make it!